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I'm quite good at self-deprecation. If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at? Aside from comedians. Comedy, that's pretty funny, isn't it? I'm a big fan of borderline-painful, awkward humour (Curb Your Enthusiam, Extras), clever parodies (The Day Today, Brass Eye), the same three animations everyone seems to like (The Simpsons, Family Guy, Futurama) and the zany, stupid, off-the-wall UK stuff (Spaced, Black Books, and so on).

Believe it or not, my life doesn't really revolve around watching TV. Mostly it revolves around music. I've been playing guitar for more than 17 years now - I'm finally okay at it, you know - and I've been an avid music fan since I was 2, or something ridiculous. I'm told I bought my first single when I was 2, which sounds impressive, but it was probably something by Wham. For a while when I was small I wanted to be a proper journalist (until I met one), and thus until recently I wrote freelance for music website drownedinsound.com, a popular, award-winning site which deals mainly with indie stuff.

Wait, wait, come back, I'm not really an indie kid so much. Sure, sure, I like guitar music and yes I own an album by Coldplay (the first one, the one you're allowed to own) but these days my music taste is an ill-concocted mess of loud noises and quiet folk and electronica beeps-and-blips. Apparently my favourites are Elliott Smith, Mclusky/Future of the Left, Postal Service, Death Cab For Cutie, Fionn Regan, Pete and The Pirates, The Thermals, Q and Not U and Frank Turner.

Actually that's a reasonably indie list, isn't it? No matter. Personally I play folk music, though I don't make enough to do it for a living. I also run a record label, which is where all the not-enough-money goes. Obviously i'm here to find someone really rich, to make my life that much easier.

I probably should have covered this earlier - I like dry humour. And when I say 'like', I mean 'love'. To the extent where I cannot be serious on any 'About Me' profile ever. That's not to say this profile is a lie - everything on it is true, aside from my overwhelming desire for a rich wife - I'm just aware that everything I say sounds heavily sarcastic. It's good that I'm self-aware. It's also good that I really like zombies and cheesy b-movies, and anything that combines b-movie horror with comedy will amuse me forever (Shaun of the Dead, Mars Attacks!).

Because I'm not married, I like to go out to bars and clubs to meet people, be entertained, get slightly merry and dance like an idiot. I guess you might have come to the conclusion by now that I'm some kind of geek. I think you're probably right.

Oh, and I really really really really like tea.

xx

Thinking of something to write in this box, I feel almost like I'm having to defend my lifestyle to my parents.

Making tea, drinking tea, being awkward when I meet people for the first time.

Hopefully not my big nose.

Tea, music, shampoo, a razor, a guitar and.. and.. a backup supply of tea?

I didn't know what the plural of 'vagina' was until I saw it listed under the Things You're Not Allowed To Put In Your Photos list.

.. you want to speak to me.

that looks suspiciously like a trick question.